Making friends with shadows on my wall

Some days just don’t feel right. The sun streams through the blinds at an unfamiliar angle, you walk as if your legs belong to someone else, you search for some elusive feeling that seems like it could be in reach — but it drifts outwards with every breath you take, as if your own exhalation is gently pushing it away.

There is a certain breed of sadness that preys only on those in solitude. Most days, he paces in the back of your mind, letting out the occasional snarl when you shake your head, disturbing his dark home. But on those days that don’t feel right, he comes out quietly and caresses your bare heart with his bared teeth like a paralyzing sadness that would rather see you wounded than see you dead. Evil, evil creature.

You’re confused. You’re drifting. You could be happy if that is what you decided to be, but this certain breed of sadness is sometimes all you’ve got, and you just don’t have it in you to hurt him.


You're always beautiful

“Look at the moon – isn’t it beautiful?” My dad asked me as I cried into the plate of food in front of me, pushing around the pieces of sushi as if by rearranging them I could rearrange my life.

“Yeah,” I sniffled, wondering where he was going with this.

“But it’s only ever a full moon once a month,” he continued. “Most of the time, the moon is just a crescent or a half moon. It’s almost never a full moon, yet it’s always beautiful.”